I recently read an Instagram post that grabbed my attention. It was about how a pretty girl lies and it had a lot of truth to it. A line that grabbed was how a pretty girl lies when she gets bullied and blames strangers but the real bullies are those at home and that touched me.
I have found myself crying and loathing myself for the past year and I finally understood. It wasn’t the person that had some internal turmoil and took it out on me that made me sad, because I don’t know that person. I expect nothing from that person. It was the people that grew with me, that birthed me that made me hate myself.
It’s a real life case where I purely think that I’m disliked (hate is a strong word) by my blood.
I know that thing where they say that siblings never show love for each other except in hard times, sometimes but I don’t want that. They shouldn’t wait till I star cutting myself or forcefully throwing up my food after eating before they realise that their words are getting to me. That is just one of those things that encourage abuse later in life. If you actually like me I want to see at least sometimes. I’m not asking to be smothered but don’t make it like my entire existence is irrelevant.
So, that got me thinking if they treat me like this who am I going to talk to when I have issues if I can’t tell that I might be on the brink of completely losing myself? Because when I do summon up the courage to go to them I am made to look stupid or silly. Even when we could be serious, they could hear but not listen. You know when they say that the older generation understands because they were there before? I don’t feel that way because they have refused to show me that they do understand.
That also led me to think about how many teens out there that need people who can talk to them without making them feel/ look stupid, hormonal or just a ‘dumb’ teenager?
You can come to us <See ‘Contact’ page> Ask us whatever you want from boy-drama to body trouble to mental health and we’ll make it no more awkward than it should be. We’ll be the family you choose.
Thanks for reading.
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